Captain Poopy Pants and the Evil Toilet by Elijah Turner

Once there lived a super hero called Captain Poopy Pants. He fighted crimes and people with drugs.

One day, a Saturday morning, Captain Poopy Pants had to fight a giant toilet who tried to destroy the world.

Help! Help! Captain Poopy Pants can you help us keep the city normal and destroy the evil toilet?  But first can you change your pants because you smell like pooh!

OK then but first can you tell me what your name is?

Our name is called Max and John.

But first let me just change my pants because of what you said. Up up and away!

Arghhhhh! Arghhhhh! Arghhhh! Arghhhh! Arghhhh!

I’m back said Captain Poopy Pants. What did I need to do again Max and John?

You need to destroy that evil toilet!

But he might have a… a laser beam and a magnetic thing that can lift you up then crash you to the floor so you can’t get up!

But you’re not a coward you’re Captain Poopy Pants and you’re not afraid of anything. Not even the scariest thing in the world; not even that!

Ok then if I really have to said Captain Poopy Pants.

So then he flied up and punched the evil toilet in the face but then guess what then happened? The evil toilet had laser beams and magnetic thing that can crush you to the floor. So then he got stuck to the magnetic thing and bashed onto a building and the building crashed down. But in all the cloud of dust no one saw that Captain Poopy Pants was not even hurt. So then the toilet was so surprised the toilet ran away because he was so scared of Captain Poopy Pants.

Come here said Captain Poopy Pants. I just want to tell you something that is very important but first let me get on your hand. And this is the thing that is very important that I need to tell you… Thwack! Thwack! In the FACE! That’s whats important for you and the thing that I actually need to tell you that’s very special special that you DON’T DESTROY THE CITY!

Yippee! Yippee! said all the grown ups and the children in the city. And then the evil toilet crashed down and broke into teenywinsey bits of metal.

By monaxle

Dad to four boys. Married to their mum. A satisficer. Lifelong cyclist, wannabe nomad, casual snapper and music lover. Occasional glimmers of creativity. Left field, anti establishment and non conformist tendencies. Green politics. Employment in mental health and children and adults social care. Open to learning, development and growth. Often get things wrong. Sometimes getting them right.

Current digital profile along the lines of #Mastodon, #Ubuntu, #NextcloudPi, #Thunderbird, #LibreOffice, #Gimp, #DigiKam, #KeePassXC, #Brave and #StandardNotes. It’s all #foss to me.

Views and opinions are my own or plagiarised and/or paraphrased from elsewhere. Whether these are right, wrong, misinformed or inspired is pretty much down to chance and your own judgement. Be well, be happy, be safe.

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